I got up at 4 a.m. today and looked up symptoms of autism. Quinn is doing better every day, but it's still a challenge to get him to look at us, except when he's having a bottle, and he still doesn't respond to our voices.
I was somewhat relived by what I found. Eye contact and not responding are signs, and he does do some repetitive behaviors, but usually just three or four head rocks or slams and always when he's playing. The other symptoms he does not show at all.
The minute Quinn woke up this morning he was better. He looked right at me, gazed at me all the way through feeding time and laughed WAY more than on previous days.
We're seeing our pediatrician a couple of days after we get home. I won't worry about it until then - although Tom and I started a new game today where we get on either side of Quinn and one of us calls him until he looks us in the eye, then the other. Quinn seems to enjoy it, and it certainly makes us feel we're doing all we can to reach him.
6 comments:
Jill,
Quinn is adorable. Congratulations! I would like to give some words of comfort. We adopted our daughter from China when she was 19 months old. She would only take her bottle or be fed when her back was to me. By the time we left China she would face me when she was being fed and made a lot of eye contact. I think the first few days is just such a change, that the eye contact is the only way the have some control over their drastically changing world. Our daughter has been home now for a year and a half. When she came home, she made such huge strides. People who were in our travel group were surprised at her progress when they saw her 5 months later. Today she is a normal 3 year old and smart as a whip. Enjoy your time in China with Quinn, rarely will you have the opportunity to be so singly focused on him. When I look back, I love our time in China for that reason. Congrats again!
Quinn is just so precious and I am sure every moment of bonding is important! I will pray that things continue to go well for you and your husband. We are worried about similar bonding problems when we finally get to travel to Beijing for our son soon, and then we will looking to you for advice! Thank you for sharing your journey with me - it's so excited! Melissa
Madge,thank you!! That's JUST what I needed to hear. He now does take the bottle and then look straight into my eyes for a little while, so we're making progress. Thank you!!
Try hard to relax. I have two adopted daughters from China, so I have been there, and done that. The way I look at it is that their affection, their giggles, and yes, their eye contact are the only things they CAN control in the first days/weeks with their new families. These children have so very much change in so very short a time.
Quinn is a gorgeous little boy, who needs time to adjust. You sound like you're doing all the right things, so try to worry less, and enjoy your time in China.
He'll share more of himself when he's ready.
Oh man...his little button nose and those soft round apple cheeks!!! He is just adorable!!! How can you not even look at him and not smother him in hugs and kisses??? Jill, don't worry....you are doing a fantastic job (and so is your husband :-) Everything you are feeling and worrying about is totally normal. Just enjoy all this time in China with Quinn...just think...it is just you, your husband, and Quinn. The three of you have SO MUCH of this oh so precious time in China. Just soak it all in....everything will fall into place in due time. We currently have 3 children (2yrs,4yrs, and 6yrs) We can't even imagine being in China(very soon..we recv'd our LOA yesterday) with our little boy....just us and him. My husband and I just giggle at the thought of having just ONE child with us,and get to spend all this time with him on top of it. Talk about special!! Not that we don't spend time with each of our children...but it will be very weird to have only our little boy while in China. Like Madge P. said...just enjoy your time :-)
It looks like you are having the time of your life...
I am starting to relax, and he is sharing more of himself very slowly. You all are right, we need to remember that it's HIS schedule we're on in this regard and give him the time he needs.
And you're so right about this time in China, being focused only on him. I'm sure it will never be like this again with chores and jobs and all the responsibilities of real life. These weeks there is nothing in our life but this amazing little guy, and that's pretty amazing in itself!!
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